Window of Opportunity

Picking the right time to enroll students in a basic etiquette course is crucial. Too early, and it goes right over their heads. Too late, and they resist it because they don't see the value of it themselves when many around them are not showing this type of behavior, even if parents are. Negative peer pressure and natural uncertainty in middle school have a lot to do with it. After that, the desire to improve, or repackage oneself, usually arises only through failure, either in a personal relationship or business venture.

The most effective window of opportunity for this training occurs in pre-teens when they first become aware of the opposite sex. This usually occurs in Grade 6 or Grade 7. It lasts until they are intimidated by peer pressure; or simply become too busy trying to meet the already demanding obligations of middle school, high school and college. These are sensitive times for children of this age bracket as they transition to young adults from childhood. Those special shy or LD ones need appropriate attention and nurturing just at the right time to encourage them to emerge from little buds into full blooming flowers.

In my experience, sixth graders come to classes all enthused and ready to absorb the information like sponges. Seventh graders enter more cautiously and warily, but usually enter into the spirit of the lessons after the first or second lesson. Unless it is their idea, eighth graders, on the other hand, generally come to the first lesson with their arms crossed in front of them and an attitude that says, "Show me!" Resistance from them is only overcome by a quality course that is presented in a fun, environment with material that is relevant to current times. From then as each year passes, the window of opportunity dwindles rapidly, and parents have increasingly less influence as time passes.

Based on over a 6800 students, it is my opinion that, generally, the sixth and seventh grade level students should be into basic manners, or "this is the way to do it right." The foundation of which is that true ladies and gentlemen are individuals who exercise consideration, sensitivity, trust, responsibility, loyalty, compromise and respect for others. Seventh and eighth graders should progress into good relationship building not only with peers but also with adults (parents especially).

Complimernts of Barbara Hinkel